Aftershock

I have a delayed reaction.

To heartache.

To grief.

To loss.

And then it hits me.

The anguish.

All at once.

As if the sky is falling.

Raining bullet tears down to the floor of the ocean.

And the Veneers fall off.

We are jelly.

Bouncing through the Universe.

We are only threads of hope.

We are only fragments of bone dangling

from small whispers and promises.

I have a delayed reaction.

To assholes.

To insults.

To bullies.

To people who shock me with their inconsideration.

With their hatred.

I become stunned.

And quiet.

In the disbelief.

And then it hits me.

All at once.

The volcano.

The deep dark animalistic protective rage.

Against those who only think of themselves.

Against the animal killers.

The hunters.

The Humans that excuse themselves

From stealing life.

Against the hypocrites.

Against those who are conscious,

but pretend not to be.

Or are too selfish to change.

I am concrete.

I am stone.

I am the voice for the voiceless.

This is the reflection of your worst nightmare.

I am the keeper of the animal spirits

That cry in anguish from your plate.

From your leather shoes.

From your gut.

Listen.

There is no more time.

The tears are falling

We are going to drown.

Is It Time To Say Goodbye?

People who have a mental illness can’t take care of themselves and they are going to end up on the street. 

Their behavior destroys families and relationships.

Their behavior is destroying them.

Believe me, I get it. I really, really do.

I have to accepted that not everyone with a mental illness will get help.

Sometimes you have to say goodbye to a person with a mental illness.

Sometimes you have to cut a person with mental illness out of your life.

This is what I read about, what advice I get, and through experience I've learned....

...like many of us I’m just trying to deal. At least now I can easily spot when a manic session is going to happen. 

I saw it this morning and knew the day was going to end a raging violent manic spiral.

It did!

He is an abusive, destructive force that no one can stand to be around lest they get pulled into convincing delusions and psychoses or have to fear his violent rage.

Being in the same room with him is like being hit repeatedly with a hard, blunt object.

It only feels good when you stop.

Believe me, I get it.

This mental illness reality is unbearably painful as it will shortly result in his having nowhere to live.

I don’t know if he will have any friends.

I don’t know if he’ll have enough food to eat.

I don’t know whether he’ll even live to tell the tale.

So you see, I get it.

I don’t just willy-nilly post this stuff....its very serious and is a dangerous situation which overwhelms me financially, and emotionally.

I am being given advice by so many "experiencers" to distance myself from "intractable crazy".

They tell me this because I need to be told.

I’m not mean, uncaring, inflexible, unhelpful or cruel.

I’m trying to save myself from this damned Titanic...I need to make the jump to a damn lifeboat, but am scared and guilty of saving myself.

People who won’t get treatment and continue to hurt you are the Titanic.

Period.

No more acceptable promises which end broken.

I can't help someone who isn't willing to help themselves.

Self destruction is ugly.

As I write this I weep. I weep for his pain. I weep for what he’s going through. I weep for what I know drives him to his behavior.

I weep for his mentally ill brain.

I weep for me because the kind, caring boy hiding under the covers is gone....

...and there’s nothing I can do to bring him back.

It's time to say Goodbye.

Standing With Standing Rock

So to the folks that have felt opposition regarding or ignored this matter. . .please, please take a moment look at the movement that is taking place!!

It is so beautiful, so raw, and so powerful!!

# 1 the people at the camps are remaining in prayer, embodying a peaceful stance and maintaining HOPE, despite the terror and serious harm incurred as a result of government authorities poor actions (these are officers that have taken an oath to protect the public)

# 2 the militarized personnel was hired to enforce the interest of Dakota Access Pipeline, not anyone else, please get that straight (they are officers from various U.S. regions and agencies. You, we are paying for terrorism against our indigenous brothers and sisters for a CORPORATION, NOT for safety . . . this is the Stanford Prison Experiment on fucking greedy heroin man)

# 3 Dakota Access (Energy Transfer Criminals) does not have legal permits to do anything on the land there! However, because they are willing to move forward illegally by paying the fines as result (paltry to them, never mind this is a criminal act and they have the hired personnel protecting them, yet Obama wants to wait it out, to see what happens, as if this is a fair and responsible action)

# 4 the treaties of Fort Laramie will clearly outline for you that the land the Standing Rock tribes are defending, is indeed theirs (actually every fucking piece of land we’re on in the America’s belong to the indigenous). Our government illegally went against their own treaty and stole the land some years later, but if we’re upholding law, as Obama promised and said he would also provide assistance should the first nations need it . . . then the Energy Transfer Criminals would not have been giving the freedom to terrorize. However, we’re clearly a terrorist country and North Dakota is a terrorist state that enables such injustices and atrocities to occur. Now the DAPL company is enforcing that bunk theft and escaping the very law our government wrote, passed and promised to uphold. Please educate yourself and review the treaty:

http://ndstudies.gov/gr8/content/unit-iii-waves-development-1861-1920/lesson-4-alliances-and-conflicts/topic-2-sitting-bulls-people/section-3-treaties-fort-laramie-1851-1868

# 5 In America there is more than one location involved in defense of opposition against the last grab for squeezing as much profit out of what’s left of the pipeline industry. Particularly, there are three camps at Standing Rock that are totally self-sustaining and self-governing with thousands of people from different cultures, age, and walks of life. They are running solely on donations and support from the outside, from us . . . from people from other tribes, other nations and countries. That is a major league guys!!

How awesome!! Imagine that, let that sit with you . . . WOW!

# 6 their are over 2,000 retired U.S. veterans heading to Standing Rock next week to assist them peacefully in defending their land.

# 7 Countless citizens have gone up to the Standing Rock camps, and many others have organized and rallied in other states in support, raising awareness, building the movement . . . you getting the picture here . . .

# 8 individuals that have been seriously harmed in ways that their lives are forever altered have received an outpour of support and monetary donations in return for their sacrifices, to help them heal and recover . . . our own government can’t even provide for and support their own vets they use and abuse for their corrupt game of real life monopoly.

What all this means . . . the totalitarian regime is losing its power, this is end game stuff here people!

We have been led by the first nations of this land, by those we have gravely oppressed and marginalized for over 500 years!

Yet, we have officers that have taken oath to protect us, protecting entities that only care for their invested interest of monetary gain . . . not human welfare, or the health and life of any being in its path! What has taken place up to now has clearly demonstrated that the people indeed have the true power, when a good amount of us unite!

I support and stand with Standing Rock and their peaceful fight, our fight! I am grateful for them and I pray for vindication and justice to be served!

Those ruling entities grasping at straws for power should be scared, they should be worried, they should be willing to retreat, they should be willing to stand down and allow the future to be birthed rightfully and freely so, as we want it. What future do you want? Looking back on history, what will you say to your grandchildren, what will your family’s legacy be?

For me, when I stared into that big oil execs eyes a few weeks back, vulnerably exposed, shaking, standing tall but crying and praying for him, all while worried that the riot cops were going to make me their next victim before I could get away . . .

I saw a brief glimpse of that fear in his eyes, that shame, that he knew what he was involved in was wrong.

I see now, despite the evil and oppression they've exhibited.

The propaganda, the lies, the backassward folks pouring out of the woodwork acting as if they’re justified for their racist and ignorant upbringing . . . A

ll that has happened and taken place . . . clearly shows that they are losing power, they are in the wrong, and that we can co-create so much more when we unite, accept differences, and appreciate another’s culture, another’s fundamental right . . .

I have no doubt that our brothers and sisters at Standing Rock with their allies, can do this, that we can help even from afar, to finally win what's rightfully theirs, ours . . . this is so much bigger than anything on the platter right now guys! Not dismissing any other injustices, pain or suffering . . . but humble yourselves . . . look deeply . . . this right here . . . this is an opportunity to right so many wrongs and to establish a strong foundation for the future we're headed towards . . . the one we want to be headed towards . . . soak it in, pray on it, feel it, breath it in and out . . . let it flow . . . let’s get it together . . .

STAND WITH STANDING ROCK, STAND FOR ALL OF OUR RIGHTS . . . WATER IS SACRED . . . SO IS LIFE . . . FREEDOM, RESPECT and SOVERIGNTY!

Sending so much love and hugs out to you all!!

"UPDATE: 11/25 COMMANDER AND STAFF
2K EVENT CAPACITY ACHIEVED
REMINDER: NO WEAPONS, NO EXCEPTIONS.

Leave your anger at home we will no doubt encounter hostility from various sources - prepare yourself mentally for that but also prepare yourself for the power of 2,000 Veterans from every corner of this country coming together with no regard for race, color, gender, politics, religious affiliation...nothing but a commitment to the oath they signed to protect this country and its people. An oath that cannot be unsigned, that promise of service and honor.

The eyes of the world are upon you now, and now more than ever we need this action to succeed.

Help make this a success for humanity and reminder that every soldier is a hero, everyday."

The Harder We Fall

The bigger your awakening bliss... the harder you will fall...

A person can struggle to fully awaken, if they’ve already had one or more smaller awakenings. Because they lock-on to that past experience - seeing it as a reference point, a goal, something to achieve, ‘get back again’ and maintain.

But this only takes them further from their perceived ‘goal’ of awakening.

Big awakening shifts are incredibly powerful - usually with many profound realisations, and weeks or months of walking around in a blissful and connected love state. It is inexplicably beautiful, but it can only last so long, because life has an even more beautiful way of making us face its truth…

Because nothing is permanent, and like all states and experiences, our apparent ‘awakening’ inevitably comes to an end, and we are thrown right back into ego and suffering, often in the form of a ‘dark night of the soul’. During this painful time, all our conditioning comes up to the surface to be healed, and the more we resist, the longer the dark night lasts.

We may go through many awakenings and subsequent dark nights during a lifetime, and this is life’s way of showing us that wholeness contains both the dark and the light, and everything is to be embraced. But of course, we are often not ready to face this truth, and the more powerful and blissful our awakening experience was, the more devastated we feel when we lose that feeling.

A voice might scream inside our heads with frustration and exhaustion, ‘I had it, but now I’ve lost it!’ And then the tears and self-pity flow, with more abundance than we ever knew possible.

We react, by trying to get back ‘there’ - to that awakened state, to that simple knowing of stillness and unconditional wholeness.

We seek that amazing past experience, because we mistakenly believe that it is how awakening should feel all the time - that awakening is a fixed emotional state. We want to get that taste of enlightenment back again, and we beat ourselves up for not being able to ‘maintain’ it.

In truth, we never ‘had’ anything, and we never ‘lost’ anything.

But it’s a very seductive and powerful trap, and the bigger our awakening bliss… the more easily we can fall for this trap, and the harder we fall.

So we keep on pounding our egos at the wall of illusion, endlessly seeking, in ever-growing suffering and frustration. We brutally reject ourselves for not being able to maintain our ‘spiritual’ identity, for not being good enough, for failing. Our dark nights can overwhelm and smother us with such intense self-hatred, that our past awakening experience seems like a distant candle of lost hope, flickering and fading in the gust of our desperation.

The more we seek what we thought we had, the further we take ourselves from recognizing that we already are it.

But there is another way – the way of self-compassion and acceptance - we can choose to stop seeking, give up the chase, let go of all our ideas and expectations about ourselves and awakening, cast aside our fears, and stand in fierce surrender to the absolute truth of life.

And when we fully surrender, it means we fully embrace and accept all aspects of ourselves, including our suffering. This is a radical act of self-love, and through this beautiful act of being, our suffering transcends into bittersweet pain, slowly losing its grip, until it dissolves completely in the power of our fearless acceptance of what is.

And then we truly wake up, to the reality that awakening is not about trying to live in bliss all the time. It’s about accepting every aspect of every moment as it arises, and right here, right in the heart of this moment, through our ultimate acceptance, we notice an effortless bliss, freedom and an end to our suffering. Pain is still present, but it is embraced and loved, just as much as more ‘desirable’ emotions. Everything is welcomed, invited, embraced and loved, in the wholeness that we are, by the wholeness that we are.

And then we see the perfection in all of it - the bigger our awakening bliss and the more deeply we experienced that unconditional love… the harder we fall and the more deeply we suffered afterwards. And in that painfully vast depth of feelings and emotions, we discover vastly richer and more beautiful expressions of life to embrace and love. And we know that we are blessed.

So we can allow ourselves to fall into our dark nights, plunging heart-first into the depths of who we are, knowing that if we truly surrender, we will discover all the love, acceptance and wholeness that we once thought we had, and once thought we’d lost.

People Are Deluded

The Buddha said people are deluded.

This Is why when they act they fall into the river of endless rebirth. And when they try to get out they only sink deeper. And all because they don't see their nature. If people weren't deluded why would they ask about something right in front of them?

Not one of they understands the movement of his own hands and feet. The Buddha wasn't mistaken.

Deluded people don't know who they are. A Buddha and no one else know something so hard to fathom.

Only the wise knows mind, this mind call nature, this mind called liberation. Neither life nor death can restrain this mind.

Nothing can. It's also called the Unstoppable Tathagata," the Incomprehensible, the Sacred Self, the Immortal, the Great Sage. Its names vary but not its essence. Buddhas vary too, but none leaves his own mind. The mind's capacity is limitless, and its manifestations are inexhaustible.

Seeing forms with your eyes, hearing sounds with your ears, smelling odors with your nose, tasting flavors with your tongue, every movement or state is your entire mind. At every moment, where language can't go, that's your mind.

The sutras say, "A Tathagata's forms are endless. And so is his awareness." The endless variety of forms is due to the mind. Its ability to distinguish things, whatever their movement or state, is the mind's awareness.

But the mind has no form and its awareness no limit.

Hence it's said, "A Tathagata's forms are endless. And so is his awareness." A material body of the four elements" is trouble.

A material body is subject to birth and death. But the real body exists without existing, because a Tathagata's real body never changes.

The sutras say,

"People should realize that the buddha-nature is something they have always had."

Kashyapa only realized his own nature.

Our nature is the mind.

And the mind is our nature.

This nature is the same as the mind of all Buddhas. Buddhas of the past and future only transmit this mind.

Beyond this mind there's no Buddha anywhere.

But deluded people don't realize that their own mind is the Buddha.

They keep searching outside.

They never stop invoking Buddhas or worshipping Buddhas and wondering Where is the buddha?

Don't indulge in such illusions.

Just know your mind.

Beyond your mind there's no other Buddha.

The sutras say,

"Everything that has form is an illusion."

They also say,

"Wherever you are, there's a Buddha."

Your mind is the Buddha.

Don't use a Buddha to worship a Buddha.

Death Is Nothing

Death is nothing at all.
It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.

Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.

Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just round the corner.

All is well.
Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again...

All I Ask

I will leave my heart at the door
I won't say a word
They've all been said before you know
So why don't we just play pretend
Like we're not scared of what's coming next
Or scared of having nothing left

Look, don't get me wrong
I know there is no tomorrow
All I ask is

If this is my last night with you
Hold me like I'm more than just a friend
Give me a memory I can use
Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do
It matters how this ends
'Cause what if I never love again?

I don't need your honesty
It's already in your eyes
And I'm sure my eyes, they speak for me
No one knows me like you do
And since you're the only one that matters
Tell me who do I run to?

Look, don't get me wrong
I know there is no tomorrow
All I ask is

If this is my last night with you
Hold me like I'm more than just a friend
Give me a memory I can use
Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do
It matters how this ends
'Cause what if I never love again?

Let this be our lesson in love
Let this be the way we remember us
I don't wanna be cruel or vicious
And I ain't asking for forgiveness
All I ask is

If this is my last night with you
Hold me like I'm more than just a friend
Give me a memory I can use
Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do
It matters how this ends
'Cause what if I never love again?

Soon I Will Be Gone

I am only 24 years old, yet I have actually already chosen my last tie. It’s the one that I will wear on my funeral a few months from now. It may not match my suit, but I think it’s perfect for the occasion.

The cancer diagnosis came too late to give me at least a tenuous hope for a long life, but I realized that the most important thing about death is to ensure that you leave this world a little better than it was before you existed with your contributions . The way I’ve lived my life so far, my existence or more precisely the loss of it, will not matter because I have lived without doing anything impactful.

Before, there were so many things that occupied my mind. When I learned how much time I had left, however, it became clear which things are really important. So, I am writing to you for a selfish reason. I want to give meaning to my life by sharing with you what I have realized:

Don’t waste your time on work that you don’t enjoy. It is obvious that you cannot succeed in something that you don’t like. Patience, passion, and dedication come easily only when you love what you do.

It’s stupid to be afraid of others’ opinions. Fear weakens and paralyzes you. If you let it, it can grow worse and worse every day until there is nothing left of you, but a shell of yourself. Listen to your inner voice and go with it. Some people may call you crazy, but some may even think you‘re a legend.

Take control of your life Take full responsibility for the things that happen to you. Limit bad habits and try to lead a healthier life. Find a sport that makes you happy. Most of all, don’t procrastinate. Let your life be shaped by decisions you made, not by the ones you didn’t.

Appreciate the people around you Your friends and relatives will always be an infinite source of strength and love. That is why you shouldn’t take them for granted.

It is difficult for me to fully express my feelings about the importance of these simple realizations, but I hope that you will listen to someone who has experienced how valuable time is.

I'm not upset because I understand that the last days of my life have become meaningful. I only regret that I will not be able to see a lot of cool stuff that should happen soon like the creation of AI, or Elon Musk’s next awesome project. I also hope that the war in Syria and Ukraine will end soon.

We care so much about the health and integrity of our body that until death, we don’t notice that the body is nothing more than a box - a parcel for delivering our personality, thoughts, beliefs and intentions to this world. If there is nothing in this box that can change the world, then it doesn’t matter if it disappears. I believe that we all have potential, but it also takes a lot of courage to realize it.

You can float through a life created by circumstances, missing day after day, hour after hour. Or, you can fight for what you believe in and write the great story of your life. I hope you will make the right choice.

Leave a mark in this world. Have a meaningful life, whatever definition it has for you. Go towards it. The place we are leaving is a beautiful playground, where everything is possible. Yet, we are not here forever. Our life is a short spark in this beautiful little planet that flies with incredible speed to the endless darkness of the unknown universe. So, enjoy your time here with passion. Make it interesting. Make it count!

Thank you!

GoFundMe - I Need Your Help

Please follow me on Facebook by clicking on link on the left.

Recently diagnosed with Lymphoma, I need help with expenses.

Here us a link to my GoFundMe

www.gofundme.com/d4-help-the-helper

This Is All We Know

Fighting flames of fire
Hang onto burning wires
We don't care anymore

Are we fading lovers?

We keep wasting colors
Maybe we should let this go
We're falling apart, still we hold together
We've passed the end, so we chase forever

'Cause this is all we know
This feeling's all we know

I'll ride my bike up to the road
Down the streets right through the city
I'll go everywhere you go
From Chicago to the coast

You tell me,

“Hit this and let's go, blow the smoke right through the window”

'Cause this is all we know

Never face each other
One bed, different covers
We don’t care anymore
Two hearts still beating
On with different rhythms

Maybe we should let this go

We're falling apart, still we hold together
We've passed the end, so we chase forever

'Cause this is all we know

Are You Ready To Jump?

For what it’s worth: It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I trust you have the strength to start over.

This is life.

People will screw you over. You’ll fight with your family. You’ll witness things that will change you forever. You’ll blame new lovers for things old lovers did. You’ll lose best friends you thought would always be there. You’ll come to realize that everyone has a past.

You’ll cry, you’ll laugh, and you’ll embarrass yourself.

But then, you’ll find your very own moment where none of that matters; where you can sit back and realize that shit happens to the people who can handle it and that this is who you are, and that no one should want to change you, including yourself.

It amazes me how easy it is for things to change, how easy it is to start off down the same road you always take and wind up somewhere new. Just one false step, one pause, one detour, and you end up with new friends or a bad reputation or a boyfriend or a breakup.

It’s never occurred to me before; I’ve never been able to see it. And it makes me feel, weirdly, like maybe all of these different possibilities exist at the same time, like each moment we live has a thousand other moments layered underneath it that look different.

It’s amazing how at one point in our lives we will be extremely close with someone and then later they will become a complete stranger.

You will pass by them without a word. Without a single acknowledging look. This person, who once knew you so well, who once knew your fears, your desires, your dreams, your past, is now walking right past you, seeing right through you.

Right now I want a word that describes the feeling you get – a cold sick feeling, deep down inside – when you know something is happening that will change you, and you don’t want it to, but you can’t stop it. And you know, for the first time, for the very first time, that there will now be a before and an after, a was and a will be. And that you will never again quite be the same person you were.

Don’t you long for something different to happen, something so new and exciting it carries you along with it like a great tide, something that lets your life blaze and burn so the whole world can see it?

I’m not going to spend my life chasing people.

You wanna leave? Fine then, go ahead.

‘Cause I’m done with chasing and caring for people who never had interest in me.

Nothing lasts and people change.

I’ve learned love is hard and life is strange.

At this age, everything is changing. Day by day...we don’t notice, but just look back over the past year and you will realize everything has.

People you thought were going to be there forever aren’t, and people you never imagined you’d be speaking to are now some of your closest friends.

Life makes little sense, and the more we grow the less sense it will make.

So make the most of it now, before it all changes once again, because in the near future, all of this is only going to be memories.

You’re afraid to do things or try something new, but in the end, if you don’t take chances, you’re going to shut out the best things in life.

You know it’s been said that we just don’t recognise the significant moments of our lives while they are happening. We grow complacent with ideas, or things or people and we take them for granted and it’s usually not until that thing is about to be taken away from you that you’ve realized how wrong you’ve been that you realized how much you need it, how much you love it.

At some point, you’ve just got to jump.

There's only so much you can learn in one place. The more that I wait, the more time that I waste.

I haven't got much time to waste it's time to make my way, I'm not afraid of what I'll face but I'm afraid to stay in one place.

I'm going down my road and I can make it alone, I'll work and I'll fight till I find a place of my own.

Are you ready to jump?

Get ready to jump, don't ever look back...just take my hand and get ready to jump!

I've  learned my lessons from the start...that the only thing I can depend on are my friends.

Life's gonna drop you down like the limbs from a tree...It sways and it swings and it bends until it makes you see.

Are you ready?

There's only so much you can learn in one place, the more that you wait, the more time that you waste.

We will make it alone, Dan and me.

You’ve got to quit being scared of the “maybes” and “what-ifs” and just fucking jump.

Quit cheating yourself out of the best thing that could ever happen to you, and just fall. Fall hard, fall long, and fall forever.

When you start to see people change, you start to wonder if they were like this in the beginning, and if you just never noticed it.

But don’t forget you once loved who they were before. Don’t take it out on them for changing, because nobody stays the same. We all grow and we all change.

People leave and things they change.

You will never get all that you want, that’s why we gotta learn to live with what we’ve do have. And no matter how much, or how little, always take comfort in knowing that someone, somewhere loves you with all of their heart.

You might not know who just yet but I promise you that there is someone out there who will give you their all, with no hesitations.

Sometimes, there are things in our life that aren’t meant to stay. Sometimes, change may not be what we want.

Sometimes, change is exactly what we need. And sometimes, saying goodbye is the hardest thing you think you’ll never have to do, but sometimes, saying hello again is the thing that breaks you down and makes you more vulnerable than you ever thought possible.

Sometimes, change is too much to bear.

But most of the time, change is the only thing saving your life.

No matter how long it takes, it will get better. No matter how many tears there will always be a time when your eyes stop crying and your eyes start shining again. Just know that everything will be alright no matter what you, he, or she thinks. Because life is nothing but a big elastic band. Stretched to one end, it will always bounce back the beginning, in the end.

I don’t think feelings change, nor people. I think situations change.

I know that it’s possible to dislike someone after loving them so much or to love someone after feeling so much hate towards them but, it’s not because people change, it’s because it’s not the same anymore. It’s because something made you think differently, something opened your eyes, something caused you to see everyday the way it is at last.

It’s like days.

Days can be cloudy, or days can be sunny but days don’t change, the weather does. And nothing can play a part in that or fix that, they can just let it be.

Are you ready to Jump?

Phoenix - out

A Clear Message - Stop War

As long as I am alive, and with my last breath, I protest! 

Stop this fighting....and end all wars!!!

Come you masters of war
You that build the big guns
You that build the death planes
You that build all the bombs
You that hide behind walls
You that hide behind desks
I just want you to know
I can see through your masks

You that never done nothin'
But build to destroy
You play with my world
Like it's your little toy
You put a gun in my hand
And you hide from my eyes
And you turn and run farther
When the fast bullets fly

Like Judas of old
You lie and deceive
A world war can be won
You want me to believe
But I see through your eyes
And I see through your brain
Like I see through the water
That runs down my drain

You fasten all the triggers
For the others to fire
Then you sit back and watch
When the death count gets higher
You hide in your mansion
While the young people's blood
Flows out of their bodies
And is buried in the mud

You've thrown the worst fear
That can ever be hurled
Fear to bring children
Into the world
For threatening my baby
Unborn and unnamed
You ain't worth the blood
That runs in your veins

How much do I know
To talk out of turn
You might say that I'm young
You might say I'm unlearned
But there's one thing I know
Though I'm younger than you
That even Jesus would never
Forgive what you do

Let me ask you one question
Is your money that good?
Will it buy you forgiveness
Do you think that it could?
I think you will find
When your death takes its toll
All the money you made
Will never buy back your soul

And I hope that you die
And your death'll come soon
I will follow your casket
By the pale afternoon
And I'll watch while you're lowered
Down to your deathbed
And I'll stand o'er your grave
'Til I'm sure that you're dead

When I Die

To children and old men that wait to die, and if you need to cry.

Cry for your brother walking the street beside you and when you need me, put your arms around anyone and give to them what you need to give to me.

I want to leave you something.

Something better than words or sounds... look for me in the people I’ve known and loved. If you cannot give me away, at least let me live in your eyes and not on your mind.

You can love me most by letting hands touch hands... by letting bodies touch bodies.... by letting go of children that need to be free.

Love doesn’t die...

...people do.

So, when all that’s left of me is love...

...give me away.

Conspiracy Theorist

You have mercury in your teeth; you’ve been injected dozens of times with mercury, aluminum and multiple other excitotoxins and neutoxins, you’re breathing nanaparticle aluminum, barium salts and lithium, your food has been poisoned with heay metals, aspartame, monosodium, glutamate and dozens of other neutoxins, your municpal water is poisoned with brain destroying hydrofluorosilic acid, lead, aluminum, chlorine and other neutoxins; you’ve been indoctrinated in globalist public schools, mesmerized and mind controlled by globalist-controled news and entertainment media and “your” government continually lies to you, threatens you with violence and scares you into submission with false-flag attacks.

So, No, I'm neither surprised nor upset when you post stupid arguments and call me a “conspiracy theorist”.

I understand, and I forgive you.

I Have Lymphoma

Someone recently asked me how I felt about being diagnosed with lymphoma. I told them it felt like I had been dropped in the middle of the sea with no lifejacket, no boat - no equipment to help me. I didn’t have time to think about how I was going to get to the other side, I just had to deal with it. I knew that thinking ‘Why me?’ wouldn’t help; I had to stay strong and focus on myself in order to get to the other side.

I had to rise up.

I had been traveling around the states the last few years and ended up here in Yuba City. 

I was not going through the best time and was feeling ill quite regularly. I thought it could be depression because of things that were going on at the time. I decided to see a specialist since I have been dealing with an immune system deficiency problem for over 30 years and thought it might have something to do with it.  I had been feeling exhausted a lot of the time and often had these strange dizzy spells.

I found a lump on my neck and was initially told it could be Tuberculosis or Lymphoma and was told I would need to have a biopsy to make a determination.  Then I got a phone call from my doctor informing me that the initial test were coming in negative for cancer, which was good, but he would need to send the node to Stanford for more test.

One week later it was diagnosed with significant traces of Hodgkin’s “like” cells; it WAS Lymphoma. I was told that I have a rare case of Lymphoma and that it is treatable, however there are variables to consider such as age, t-cells, health etc… that the majority of people come through this well.

I will be seeking treatment in Reno, Nevada and am relocating there in a few days.  This cancer scare isn’t new to me. I have been dealing with health issues for years; colon cancer, anal cancer, both of which I had tumors removed.

I still don’t know how I feel about this recent diagnosis of lymphoma, but having been dealing with cancer for years; I feel strong that I can fight it.

Having said that, naturally there is always part of me that is looking over my shoulder.

But no matter what happens, I must rise up.

I’m broken down and tired of living life on a merry-go-round and you can't find the fighter but I see it in you so we gonna walk it out and move mountains.

And I'll rise up, I'll rise like the day.  I'll rise up, I'll rise unafraid. I'll rise up and I'll do it a thousand times again, and I'll rise up, high like the waves.  I'll rise up, In spite of the ache.  I'll rise up and I'll do it a thousand times again.

When the silence isn't quiet and it feels like it's getting hard to breathe….I know I feel like dying but I promise I'll take the world to it's feet and move mountains.

Bring it to it's feet and move mountains.

I will rise
I will rise

Being Happy Not Good Business

Being happy isn’t very good for the economy.

If we were happy with what we had, why would we need more?

How do you sell an anti-aging moisturiser?

You make someone worry about aging.

How do you get people to vote for a political party?

You make them worry about immigration.

How do you get them to buy insurance?

By making them worry about everything.

How do you get them to have plastic surgery?

By highlighting their physical flaws.

How do you get them to watch a TV show?

By making them worry about missing out.

How do you get them to buy a new smartphone?

By making them feel like they are being left behind.

To be calm becomes a kind of revolutionary act.

To be happy with your own non-upgraded existence.

To be comfortable with our messy, human selves, would not be good for business.

Boycott Presidential Election

When you are emotionally manipulated into choosing who to vote for because fear of the other person scares you more than the insane person on your team, well, I mean.... come on..... really?

And people claim to be "awake" and "see" things clearly and say they know that the system is rigged... yet will run right out and "vote" even if the rigged system is providing both choices, and both choices are corrupt liars who will do whatever is necessary to get a vote.... mind blown.

Wake me up when its all over. They are both liars and corrupt, this is an understatment. And No, I was no Bernie Supporter either, I understand more taxation and socialism are not the way, but Clinton and Trump. Really?

These are your choices, and with all the evidence against both, and with critical thinking applied - that neither are the answer to the rigged system everyone claims to be tired of, one of these insane people will be the next Puppet to read off teleprompters, start more wars, and continue the current system as those Puppets before them....... WOW.

Look how easily some of you are swayed to abandon your own conscience and replace it with "but" , because you allow your emotions to be swayed by forces outside of yourself..... and we dare speak of Truth and Freedom??? Really??? I am at a loss for what I am watching happen sometimes.

America’s celebrates its 240th birthday.

When historians conduct their autopsy on Lady Justice, that will be the time of death.

That is the precise moment when Justice drew her last labored breath, cursed our ridiculous country and our hopelessly corrupt government, and collapsed.

Sure, she’d been in bad shape for a while, but there was no surviving the final blow. When it is explicitly announced and made public that the wealthiest and most elite and most liberal are indeed above the law, the charade of “law” cannot continue.

There is no law.

We are living under the rule of men, not of law. We are subject to the whims of petty tyrants and bureaucrats.

They are subject to no one on Earth.

So far we have seen evidence of massive election fraud all across the country, which gives us reason to believe that the fraud will continue.

Our president Barack Obama and the U.S. State Department have done nothing about the obvious rigging of our elections, which gives us reasonable suspicion that our government and the integrity of our electoral process has been compromised in order to place their chosen candidate in power against the will of the American people.

The U.S. State Dept. says that a discrepancy in exit polls of more than 2% indicates fraud, we have had discrepancies outside of that margin in at least 16 of the state primaries all the way up to a discrepancy of 23%.

These discrepancies have only happened in one of our political parties and they have all been in favor of one candidate. On top of the exit poll discrepancies there has been reports of ballots cast in the names of deceased citizens, patients of mental hospitals, and elderly people with dementia.

There has been reports of registration purging, switching of party affiliations, vote flipping, and massive voter suppression.

Not to mention the millions of voters who have not been allowed to vote because they do not claim any party affiliation.

Multiple major universities have calculated that in order to get our current results without election fraud, the odds would be 1 in 70 billion.

This level of election fraud is usually only done covertly and in 3rd world countries, now it's being done openly and blatantly in the United States.

Our democracy is being stolen and we very well maybe on the brink of a dictatorship, we can no longer trust our government and we need help from the outside.

So we are respectively requesting the U.N. to step in and assess the integrity of our electoral process.

We also request that you review the apparent fraud of our current results and ensure credibility and transparency moving forward.

We feel that your help is imperative to avoid an inevitable major conflict in the U.S. due to corruption in our government.

Trump is known to be a demagogue, which is a person, especially an orator or political leader, who attempts to gain power by arousing people’s emotions and prejudices.

The shaping of the will of Congress and the choosing of the American president has become a privilege reserved to the country’s equestrian classes, a.k.a. the 20% of the population that holds 93% of the wealth, the happy few who run the corporations and the banks, own and operate the news and entertainment media, compose the laws and govern the universities, control the philanthropic foundations, the policy institutes, the casinos, and the sports arenas.

Don't be fooled by the political games, and absurdity of our sickening and corrupt government. 

Do not vote! 

Send a strong message to your government; stopping the perpetuation of this Illusion of Freedom being shoved down our throats...

When principles that run against my deepest convictions begin to win the day, then battle is my calling...I must, at the price of dearest peace, lay my convictions bare before family, friends and enemy, with all the fire of my truth.

When a politician tells us that he'll stick to his beliefs when in office, we usually murmur something about corporate interests and "the fat cats in City Hall."

Well, it turns out that politicians are the ones who should be cynical about us. Science is finding that some pretty weird stuff can make us forget what we stand for on Election Day. At least the politicians are being swayed by briefcases full of cash.

With us, it can be things as simple as ...

Ever since JFK out-sexied Nixon during the first-ever televised presidential debates, looks have mattered in politics.

Studies have shown that more attractive politicians get greater press coverage and more air time and of course, the best thing you can do if you are a lady politician is hit the gym.

But looks also matter in ways you might not expect when it comes to which politicians people vote for, and being the most attractive isn't always the most important thing.

When it comes to men, being fit and attractive is helpful but nothing compared with being overweight.

Apparently, voters see more rotund male candidates as more trustworthy and even more inspiring than their thinner competition.

Other very detailed studies have shown that we tend to favor men with specific facial characteristics, which basically boils down to voting for more distinguished-looking gentlemen as opposed to "baby-faced" candidates.

It doesn't even matter what the candidates' policies are. Studies show that when people are presented with pictures of politicians for even a second and know absolutely nothing about the politicians' beliefs or what party they are in, certain candidates will always come out on top.

And since that's the first thing you find out about a candidate, some guys are coming from behind to begin with.

According to a study at MIT this phenomenon isn't limited by where you vote. People in different countries continually find certain candidates more trustworthy and electable based on their looks, no matter how different their cultures. And as long as those politicians are guys, it is the chubby yet distinguished-looking ones every time.

Anyone who has voted knows that the government isn't picky about what constitutes a "public polling place."

The motto seems to be: If it would be considered slightly below average for a weekly bingo game, it's good enough for the linchpin of democracy.

On Election Day, you might find yourself voting anywhere from a supermarket parking lot to some dude's garage -- as long as it can fit some curtained cubicles and a couple of old ladies making sure you don't cheat off your neighbor.

In addition to making you feel worse about America, the location where you cast your ballot might actually be brainwashing you with subtle environmental factors you don't even notice.

For instance, studies have shown that if your local polling place is a school, you will vote yes for more school initiatives on the ballot, especially if there are teachers or students nearby. Using exit polling data, the studies found that this was the case even if the measures were not something the voters would typically support.

Boycott Presidential Elections

I Choose My Path

I cannot be part of a world where men dress their wives as prostitutes by showing everything that should be cherished.

Where there is no concept of honor and dignity, and one can only rely on those when they say “I promise” .

Where women do not want children, and men don’t want a family.

Where the suckers believe themselves to be successful behind the wheel of their fathers` cars, and a father who has a little bit of power is trying to prove to you that you’re a nobody.

Where people falsely declare that they believe in God with a shot of alcohol in their hand, and the lack of any understanding of their religion.

Where the concept of jealousy is considered shameful, and modesty is a disadvantage.

Where people forgot about love, but are simply looking for the best partner.

Where people repair every rustle of their car, not sparing any money or time on themselves...they look so poor that only an expensive car can hide it.

Where the boys waste their parents money in nightclubs, aping under the primitive sounds, and girls fall in love with them for this.

For those who choose a different path-get branded as retarded despots.

I choose my path, but it’s a pity that I did not find similar understanding in the people among whom I wished to find it most of all ….

Taking Care Of My "self"

A year ago I started writing a few posts about how I needed to focus on my health. But was very busy with Project Phoenix Rising.

I recently closed the project with a 100% success rate.

I was diagnosed with anal cancer years ago and have had a few tumors removed.  A recommendation of chemo and radiation was suggested, but I respectfully declined. 

Today I am facing a new health scare....Lymphoma for which I am scheduled to have a biopsy to confirm diagnosis.

I'm the strongest person you'll ever meet when I'm battling for somebody else, but when it's me, not so much.

I lost all motivation with my blog.

I’ve gained about fifteen pounds, but I’ve not been taking care of myself.  It’s time to focus on my health again, and not on the scale.

I've realized how much of what you must do involves the word “self”. No accident there. To be self-focused doesn’t preclude being other-focused.

To be a healthy, balanced person, you must be both.

However, all the time I've  been taking care of others, I've lost ground focusing on me.

I am going to have to start paying lots more attention to my wants and needs.

I began reflecting on my inner workings and am able to express my desires. Being self-focused means getting to know every inch of myself, understanding my "self" as best I can by staying connected to what brings me pleasure and pain and every feeling in between.

Racism Declared Mental Illness

Question:  Why do we hate?
Answer:  Because we are ignorant.

We are taught to hate by ignorant people, who were taught an ignorant thing; that there are 4 or 5 different races. This is NOT true. 

There is only one race on this planet, and we are all members of that race.

The human race.

We have seperated us so that some people can see themselves as superior to the others.

We need to get over this; there is no gene for bigotry. 

I hear people say that racism is inbred, no it is not. Racism is not part of the human condition. Racism is a learned response.  You aren't born a bigot, you are taught by your parents to be a bigot/racist.

We are born into a racist society.

Like anything else if you can learn it, you can unlearn it. People like this choose not to unlearn it because they are afraid they will lose power if they share it with other people.

They are afraid of sharing power, that’s what it’s all about.

What we’re dealing here with is mental illness.

Racism is mental illness.

Racism was defined by the President’s Joint Council On Mental Health In Children in 1959 as being the number one mental health problem among children in the United States.

They didn’t say ‘among black children,’ they said ‘among children.’

The purpose with this post, is to lead people out if ignorance by thinking that you are better than someone else because of an amount of chemical in the pigment of your skin.

Pigmentation of your skin does not determine your intelligence or your worth as a human being.

If you judge other people by the color of their skin, by the amount of a chemical in their skin, you have a mental problem.

You are not dealing well with reality.

Opinions

I believe that everyone has the right to an opinion, unless your opinion is stupid.

I grew up learning that you should respect everyone’s opinions, no matter how different from your own it may be, respect is essential, however,  I was the would happily call you out if you said something that was not true.

Opinions are such weird things.

We live in a society where we are uncensored; we say whatever we want, whatever we believe to be true, but then what about when someone says something that seems illogical, biased and silly?

Are their opinions less valid?

Should they not be allowed to voice that opinion?

People say,

"...it’s fine to have that opinion but just keep it to yourself in order not to offend."

But that makes me question, why are some opinions considered more worthy of voicing than others?

A clear example of this in the world today is how willing our society is to shut down religious points of view altogether in favor of a more truthful views.

Isn’t that robbing religious people of the same freedom of speech that, everyone is entitled to?

Someone may ask why he isn’t allowed to share his viewpoint because it’s a free country and he has free speech, but free speech is not an excuse to offend.

I feel that people should be allowed to have their own opinions and we are allowed to question those opinions and opinions are allowed to change.

Opinions should be backed by truth, not ideology or faith, but let's stop hiding under the guise of free speech in order to spew out bullshit.

None of us are immune to dumb opinions.

Even the smartest and most aware of us can suffer from a lapse in judgment or a belief and information, or be unaware of an intellectual blind spot, or even allow our feelings and our feelings about ourselves to cloud our judgments.  

A very wise man once said, there are a billion ways to squeeze an orange, but only one way you get juice.

4th Of July Bullshit

Don't buy into today's patriotic crap. The 4th of July patriotic nonsense is designed to make you an unthinking tool of the right. The American Revolution is the biggest hoax perpetrated on the American public since the Holocaust.

In point of fact:

it didn't happen!

Think about it. The myth-makers want you to believe that a nation of British colonists, who happened to be more prosperous than their British overseers, rose up against the British King in open rebellion! Yeah, right.

Successful farmers, businessmen, laborers and lawyers threw away all they had worked for and joined together in this rebellion. This alone is reason enough to disprove the myth. The myth makers want us to believe that wealthy and content colonists shed their blood and livelihoods contesting the most powerful military force in the world for the single reason that a stupid and insignificant tax on stamps interfered with their effete concept of individual liberty!

I just watched a patriotic movie on TV called "The Howards of Virginia." The producers (and the pandering network that aired this saccharine, nationalistic film) want us to believe that 18th century farmers and plantation owners left their comfortable estates unattended to join Washington's pitiful band of ragtag miscreants.

According to the movie, these farmers were away from home shooting redcoats for several years, allowing their fields to go fallow and their slaves unattended. Supposedly, after the war, these gallant, rich farmers returned home and picked up the pieces where they left off, as if time had stood still.

Pure bullshit!

Any reasonable man knows that untended slaves would runaway, and unpaid property taxes would result in seizure of their farms by the local authorities for delinquent property taxes. Use your head! Such patriotic trash can make sense only if we abandon our reason and common sense!

Are we to believe these patriotic farmer/soldiers -- with barely a frozen potato to share among them and only rags to bind their feet -- marched hundreds of miles to trap and defeat Cornwallis -- the most brilliant General in the world at the time?

Never happened! Couldn't happen! Never mind that most of the colonists were Tories loyal and sympathetic to the King. Most early Americans loved their King!

The revolutionaries were merely a handful of misguided terrorists.

The tall tales of Washington at Valley Forge purport to be true American history.

Read the myth and laugh folks.

The conditions described would stop a modern army of professional soldiers in their tracks, much less a band of gentlemen farmers:

Many wounded soldiers from previous battles died from exposure. Long marches had destroyed shoes. Blankets were scarce. Tattered garments were seldom replaced. At one point these shortages caused nearly 4,000 men to be listed as unfit for duty. Undernourished and poorly clothed, living in crowded, damp quarters, the army was ravaged by sickness and disease. Typhoid, jaundice, dysentery, and pneumonia were among the many diseases that killed 2,500 men that winter.

Even the myth of Valley Forge belies itself, for it says that these pathetic warrior citizens tried to desert and Washington had them shot for it!

But the most ridiculous aspect of the myth is that these pathetic souls endured it all for a fucking abstract idea.

Liberty? Freedom?

Please!

Richard Trumka, President of the AFL-CIO union has exposed this absurdity for what it is, pure extremist right wing propaganda:

Let's call this right-wing "freedom" catch phrase what it really is: a grossly political strategy to dupe the public, which holds the word "freedom" as something sacred.
Our Department of Homeland Security is spreading the real truth as well:

A new study funded by the Department of Homeland Security characterizes Americans who are “suspicious of centralized federal authority,” and “reverent of individual liberty” as “extreme right-wing” terrorists.

Two hundred years ago people may not have had computers, but they weren't stupid. Take a look at this picture and tell me you would suffer the indignities shown in defense of a single, nebulous "sacred" idea.

The absurdity of it all sickens me!

Little Black Sandles

I'm being dragged down, down by the hand
The hand of a golden giant man
He's crushing my knuckles
Splitting my skin

He says,

"he'll let go if only I'd ask it of him"

He says

"Boy, it's your call...you wanna fly"

So I shout,

"I wanna get away from you, as fast as I can...I tell my feet to move it...I hope they have a plan"

These little black sandals
Are walking me away
These little black sandals
Are heading the right way

These little black sandals
Are walking me away
These little black sandals
Saved my life today

So now I'm free
Free
From the big bad giant
Who was stalking me

Thank you feet, for guiding me
I'm glad somehow I got brains down there, at least

These little black sandals
Are walking me away
These little black sandals
Are heading the right way

Sometimes I'm tempted
Sometimes I am
I would be lying if I said I didn't miss that giant man
He was the line between pleasure and pain
But me and the feet have some years to reclaim

These little black sandals
Are walking me away
These little black sandals
Are heading the right way

These little black sandals
Are walking me away
These little black sandals
Saved my life today

It's Not Enough To BeLIEve

It is important to understand that mystical religion is radically different from non-mystical religion in insisting that nothing short of direct experience of God is enough.

It is not enough to believe that God exists.

It is not enough to believe that God has incarnated to bring spiritual salvation to the world.

It is not enough to go to a church, synagogue, mosque, or temple or to participate in the forms or rituals of religion.

It is not enough to pray, meditate, perform charitable acts, visit places of pilgrimage, fast, endure other physical austerities, study holy books, or associate with holy persons.

It is not enough to undergo psychotherapy.

Nothing short of direct experience of God is enough.

Fuck Society

What is it about society that disappoints you so much?

Is it that we collectively thought Steve Jobs was a great man even when we knew he made billions off the backs of children?

Or maybe it's that it feels like all our heroes are counterfeit; the world itself's just one big hoax. Spamming each other with our burning commentary of bullshit masquerading as insight, our social media faking as intimacy.

Or is it that we voted for this? Not with our rigged elections, but with our things, our property, our money.

I'm not saying anything new. We all know why we do this, not because Hunger Games books makes us happy but because we wanna be sedated. Because it's painful not to pretend, because we're cowards.

Fuck Society.

Research

re·search (ˈrēˌsərCH,rəˈsərCH)
noun

1. the systematic investigation into and study of materials and sources in order to establish facts and reach new conclusions.

"Never take someone else's word, do you own research."

I'm currently seeking treatment to have yet another tumor removed.

In the meantime, check out the topics I plan to write about.... (see pic)

Phoenix - out.

Angel Flying To Close To The Ground

I knew someday that you would fly away, for love's the greatest healer to be found, so leave me if you need to, I will still remember...

Fly on, fly on past, the speed of sound, I'd rather see you up than see you down...So leave me if you need to, I will still remember...

...Good-bye Dad.

Acharya S/D.M. Murdock Memoriam

With the passing of a dear friend and great scholar, Acharya trusted in the statement,

"Love is the power over all."

Most are aware by now that a tragedy occurred as Acharya S/D.M. Murdock passed away due to cancer on December 25th, 2015. The cancer became resistant and came back very aggressively and took over her immune system and liver. Chemo-sensitivity testing revealed that absolutely nothing available can stop this type of cancer at this time. She worked so hard to defeat this cancer as everything she ate or drank was anti-cancerous because she did not want to die and leave her son and her work.

We are all devastated.

I have just lost a great friend. It was a privilege and an honor to know her. She was truly extraordinarily special.

The grief I feel for such a loss is heartbreaking.

D.M. Murdock, aka Acharya S was an independent scholar of comparative religion and mythology She was classically educated at some of the finest schools, receiving a degree in Classics and Greek Civilization, from Franklin & Marshall College. D.M. Murdock was also a member of one of the world's most exclusive institutes for the study of Ancient Greek Civilization, the American School of Classical Studies at Athens, Greece.

Acharya S was not only a significant contributor to breaking through the barriers of ancient religions through exposing their mythical characters but was the first woman to expose the male dominated world of religion that has become a manipulation and control of human kind for political and religions agenda's of power over the unquestioning masses.

Murdock served as a trench master on archaeological excavations in Corinth, Greece, and Connecticut, USA, as well as a teacher's assistant on the island of Crete. Murdock was proficient in English, Greek, French, Spanish, Italian, German, Portuguese just to name a few.

DM Murdock is the author of several books, including The Christ Conspiracy and Christ in Egypt: The Horus-Jesus Connection among many others. She was a proponent and leading scholar of the Christ myth theory. Her latest Book “Did Moses Exist? ” provides a massive amount of information from antiquity about the world's religious traditions and mythology, including how solar myths, wine cultivation and fertility cults have shaped the Bible and Judaism. This book is revered as the most comprehensive study to date on the subject of Moses.

She was a leader in the freethought movement and challenged the status quo. She showed us that it was okay to speak out against the unfair treatment of women in heavily religiously indoctrinated cultures. She challenged us to question everything including Jesus’ historicity. She inspired many people to learn more about the mythological origins of modern day religions.

D.M. Murdock/Acharya S spent a good portion of her career debunking Christianity.

I got chills up my spine when I learned that she passed away on Christmas, the same day she frequently cited as being the same birthday as various solar myth saviors. She was down to earth, beautiful, incredibly knowledgeable, extremely intelligent, honest, and straightforward.

She was all of this and much more to many.

A rare gem.

I hope her influential works continue to receive the attention and study they deserve academically.

“When he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars, And he will make the face of heaven so fine That all the world will be in love with night And pay no worship to the garish sun.”

Related Articles


The Christ Conspiracy
The Nature Of Reality

Project Phoenix Rising

I've received many emails from my readers inquiring about my health, and why I haven't been posting articles.

Earlier this year I was diagnosed with Anal Cancer. The same type that Farrah Fawcett & Robert Kardashian succumbed to.

To actually hear my Dr. use The C-word filled me with dread thinking the worst.

When I got home, I took a little time to digest the information I had received. Once the initial shock had subsided, I was flooded with emotions.

Not only have I been living with a chronic virus for over 30 years, I get hit with this crap.

Well, I finally was able to come to terms with it all.

This sabbatical I took from my blog gave me the opportunity to stand back and reflect on my life. I made a new friend, changed my lifestyle and started embracing life more.

I wanted to start something new – my own personal project.

This is something I had wanted to do on a much larger scale but just hadn't the funds nor manpower to do so.

So I decided to start small...

...Project Phoenix Rising, Helping Lift People from The Ashes...one by one.

Today is Martin Luther King, Jr's birthday....MLK was destined to be a leader and influencer, because he was hand-selected to be a martyr for his cause.....or was he great because he chose to be?

MLK was a rare talent...a present-day Moses who would lead his people to the Promised Land.

But maybe ....just maybe his greatness was in making his own choice.

He chose to be generous.

He chose to be a leader.

He chose to be a great organizer.

He chose to reach out to people

He chose to keep working.

Most of us have faced the same threats and hatred that MLK faced during his lifetime.

What’s holding us back?

Why aren’t all of us more like MLK?

Well the truth of the matter is we can’t all be MLK's...but we can do everything in our power to make life better for the people around us, by giving generously.

I understand we all have innate human potential to be of service, to make a difference.

I understand that humanity’s biggest achievements arise from lone individuals who are willing to learn, and sharing with hearts of generosity.

We are all ...“standing on the shoulders of giants,” --Isaac Newton

I understand that with our social media and instant texts communications....it is now possible for anyone to make a bigger difference in the world if you CHOOSE to do so.

I had been thinking about this a lot in my own life....I wanted to be more generous. I wanted to make more of a difference.

How can I do the most good with what I have to offer, in the most efficient way possible?

Whether we realize it or not, we are all inter-connected.

No one is every truly alone.

Project Phoenix Rising is an organization that is set out to help people whose lives have destroyed by a set of circumstances outside of their control. PPR helps by providing several services, such as Financial Support, Housing, Employment Services, Spiritual Education and Guidance, Organic Healing, Organic Food Nutrition, Exercise, Meditation Practices, and most importantly ...LOVE.

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Phoenix out -